Anyone who knew me before would tell you what a push over I was. The running joke was if you asked me to do anything 3 times I would say yes. I was always worried about disappointing my friends, missing out on the best time ever (which was every time), or getting left out of the loop.
After college, and 6 careers later, when I finally found my dream job, I took on any and every responsibility thrown my way. I worked from 5 am until 8 pm, 6 days a week, because the only time I turned down a client was if the time slot was full. Whenever my bosses gave me a revenue goal, I beat it, and as a result the following month my goal would increase. When they offered me a management job, I said yes, completely unsure if it was a direction that made sense for me. If I said no, someone else would have taken it and I didn't want to disappoint those who gave me the offer.
In addition to working insane hours, I had to balance a relationship, friendships, and my family. I hated saying no. I would finish my 12 hour shift, freshen up quickly, then drive 2 hours in traffic to meet with my friends. I spent my one free day a week with my parents, because that's what they expected. I had no me time.
I was terrified of saying no. I got sick all the time, but worked anyway. When I went to bed I think I died for the 4 hours I shut my eyes. I felt drained and lost.
It got so bad, a good friend sent me to see a coach. After a few months of working with her, I decided I needed to change the direction of my life; I had to quit the job I loved. I was so scared of what they would think of me and who would get my clients. Would they be alright without me? Who will need me if I leave?
Quitting was the hardest thing I ever did. To be honest, I struggled with all the free time I had and went into a small depression. After about a week of watching sitcoms and surfing the net I started getting to know me. I picked up a new certification, signed up for tennis lessons, called back old friends, and did what I wanted. Other changes were that my parents would not get to see me every weekend, I would only see friends who made a similar effort to see me, and I cut out people and things that were negative in my life.
In 3 full months, my schedule is almost full (with people coming out of thin air), I am training for this competition which will open new doors, and I am meeting amazing people who introduce me to new avenues in health and fitness. My old job never gave me the time or space to do any of this. Money will come and go, but if you do what truely makes you happy you will never work a day in your life.
End of Rant:
The moral is that you don't have to say yes to everything; the restaurant your friend picked out; every dessert (trust me they all taste like sugar); every drink handed to you (every night is the same); all the responsibility put on you at work. Figure out what is important to you and stick to it.
If your health is important, stand up for it. Pick a restaurant or activity that will keep you on track, for example don't eat at your favorite Indian restaurant.
When you schedule in a workout it is your time. If someone wants it, say no. It is just as important as a meeting with a client or a friend. If you are unwell or unhappy with yourself it will affect how others see you, and eventually your job when you have to take a sick day or die. You won't lose your job or friends if you are strong and honest. In fact you might inspire them.
If you are trying to cut out sugar, learn to turn down dessert. Saying you have no will power is like saying you have no abdominal muscles; they exist, but they need work in order to surface. Save the "YES" for the special moments like birthdays, weddings, anniversaries, or gourmet restaurants.
In the beginning I saw saying "NO" to my favorite foods as a negative, but each time I turned from a bad food, I said yes to a healthier one and I cannot begin to tell you how amazing I feel.
Only do what makes sense for you. After all, you are in charge of your body and mind.
Yesterday's workout was sort of awesome! Since it was a cardio day, we worked on smaller muscle groups, then ended with cardio and abs.
Cardio Core Workout:
- Bis and Tris Circuit: (3 sets)
- 10-12 Barbell bicep curls (heavy weight)
- 15-20 Dumbell bicep curlsn (half the weight of the heavy weight)
- 10-12 Tricep cable pull down
- 15-20 Dumbell tricep kickbacks (half the weight of the cable pull downs)
- Cardio Core Circuit: (4 sets)
- 500 meter row as fast as possible or .25 mile sprint on treadmill, as fast as possible
- 1 minute plank on ball
- 20 romanian twists (20 each side)
- 15 leg raises with ball (drop ball if it's too heavy)
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